While having a chat he said he couldn't get over the fact that his ex girlfriend was now going out with a very "average Joe"... I mean, how could she possibly move from Mr Perfect to Mr "I-blend-into-the-background"???
Forgone conclusion: Love is blind!
But is it really? I gave it a thought...
Infatuation is blind, attraction can have impaired vision, but true love? I guess not...
True love is the one that sees the best, it can see into the depths of our hearts and souls with a clarity beyond compare.
Love is blind! Really?!
In most cases that's the furthest thing from the truth.
The partners see something in each other that is not ready visible to others outside the relationship, something that the rest of the world don't see... making the rest of the world blind, but certainly not love!
True love is receptive of all aspects of the other person with no exceptions, the lovers are not blind, they see very well, they see the good, worthy, solid facets of each other as well as the imperfect, annoying and challenging ones... they're not blind, they're just totally accepting of one another.
When infatuation turns into love it clears the vision to see deeper than outer attributes, we don't fall in love with beauty, we're attracted by beauty but we fall in love with the person.
The thing is that there is a very fine line between attraction and love and without some serious soul searching it's quite difficult to distinguish the two.
We are all attracted by the "idea" of love and it's not difficult to see how the desire to be in that euphoric state could lead one to mistakenly label a fierce attraction as "true love"
But love is an emotion that evolves over time. First we are attracted and then gradually we get to know our partner well and the initial infatuation translates into love.
I believe that attraction and infatuation deny any imperfection while true love embraces them
Love's keen vision doesn't miss a single detail.
Someone said "True love is not blind, it merely enables one to see clearly what others fail to notice". To that person I want to say thank you, you taught me a great lesson!
5 comments:
Dare I comment? Two words in that post confuse me, and always have done. One is "love" the other is "soul". I prefer to use words that I understand. However... I think I can risk suggesting that pure simple "love" actually has very little to do with what goes on between most men and most women, indeed most "partners" of any kind, because biology gets too much in the way. I'm being careful here, as my dear wife is lying beside me, watching my fingers as they tap, though not too closely. However... tip-toeing onwards... A person's devotion to their pet... that allows me to start to approach the concept of true love with greater clarity. I had a cat when I was a boy, and I loved that cat. No question about it. No doubt, debate or difficult definition. Then I grew up, the cat I loved died, and things became more complicated. But love is complicated, whatever it is. And soul? Well, soul is just another word for mystery, to me.
Is there such a thing as "true love"?
If you disregard attraction and infatuation are you not just left with the kind of love you have for your siblings or children?
Andrew - I agree with you, biology gets in the way... But biology is of all animal species while love belongs to a few and the choices one makes for love almost exclusively to the human species... that must count for something (call it soul or anything else you like...)
This is of course my personal humble opinion :-))
Ruth - True love isn't depleted of attraction and infatuation, is an evolution of them...
And isn't the love you have for your kids and siblings "true love" anyway? You know all their defects and you love them unconditionally nonetheless :-)
Dona said: "But biology is of all animal species while love belongs to a few"
How did Dona figure that out? You've only ever experienced being a human, haven't you?
Oh, I'm forgetting you have access to a higher authority - yes, the cats must have told you.
Yes I think thats the point I'm trying to make (badly!).
Maybe I've just become cynical due to experiences and old age, but the only love I could call "true love" is the love I have for my own children.
Reluctant though I am to agree with Andrew, biology does "get in the way" in other relationships. And yet, they wouldn't be fulfilling without biology getting in the way ;-)
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